comparing leads to despairing

We are all constantly comparing things.

Which is the better bargain?

Which tastes better?

Which one will last longer?

Which one do I like better?

Which one of us is prettier? Smarter?

My house isn’t as nice as hers.

I’m better at this than they are.

I’m not as far along in my career as my college roomate.

Why did he get the promotion that I want?


Do you see what happened there?

Sometimes comparing THINGS is just fine.

But comparing ourselves, nope. Not so much.

It almost always starts us down a slippery slope where we make it mean something more than it is. We make it mean something about ourselves or others, and our worthiness…which leads to despair.


Besides, the comparisons just aren’t fair.

They aren’t blind taste tests.

They aren’t objective AT ALL.


We are comparing our insides to other people’s outsides. We compare what we think and feel – along with the secrets and struggles we know about ourselves – to the well cultivated picture we see of other people – the exterior, not the interior.


We see the instagram worthy images of people. The photoshopped and posed versions.  We see the greener grass. But chances are pretty good that the greener grass is fake turf.


When we’re tempted to compare, why don’t we swap things out? Instead of allowing someone to win the comparison, decide to learn something from them, or to take an action to move yourself forward.


And here’s a bonus oatmeal raisin cookie: you can simply admire someone without comparing yourself to them. If you would rather have a chocolate chip cookie, knock yourself out. There’s room for all different kinds of cookies to be popular! One doesn’t have to be better; we all just have our preferences.


In the meantime, remember these things: You are loved. We are all loved. Let’s all be kind. And in all things – progress, not perfection!

Love, and light in the pages,


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